why is it important to give children sufficient time to express themselves in their own words

2 ANSWERS

1. amomipais82
   

   Hi,
   Because a child's 'feelings' are IMPORTANT and they must be acknowledged and accepted, no matter how 'bad' they may be. When I was little, I'd say 'I feel ... ' and my mother would say 'No, you don't, you feel ...' and she'd say the EXACT OPPOSITE. I KNEW what I felt was 'right' (I was feeling it) and felt that my 'feelings' didn't 'count' and that no one 'cared' about me because I was consistently told 'what to feel, how to feel' and never listened to.
   When my kids were young, my second son was really angry at me one day and shouted "I hate you!" I looked at him straight in the eye, and said "Good ... that means I'm doing my job correctly." He looked perplexed, and said "You're not mad at me for hating you?" I said I wasn't angry, that 'hate' is a feeling that REQUIRES love to feel, and that he'd 'figure it out' when he got older. He looked at me again, then put his arms around me (he was already taller than me) and said "I do love you, Mom ... but sometimes you are really FRUSTRATING. I was really angry at you, and now I'm not just 'okay' with you, but I actually do LOVE you even more. I'm going to go think hard about that for awhile." And he went into his room and put himself on a 'long time out' all by himself. THAT is why a child should be given 'sufficient time to express themselves in their own words.' They LEARN FASTER AND BETTER than when they are 'told what and how to feel.' And the 'feeling' they do have is 'valid' no matter what it is ... and it's easier to 'guide' knowing that than to 'assign feelings' and ASSUME the child will do what you want (or what is needed) ...

   Report (2) (1)  |   12 years, 8 month(s) ago  

2. Guest5701
   

   It is important that children are given the time to express themselves in their own time as this builds confidence and self esteem.  Rushing the child and finishing their sentences for them may cause them to become reliant on others to speak on behalf of them. Listening to a child effectively allows the child to speak freely without feeling pressured. When children feel they have all the time in the world to express themselves they will feel comfortable to talk freely which helps to develop communication and language skills.  Giving a child time to express themselves will also build a positive relationship with the child as they will feel they can trust you and will be able to confide in you if needed.  Children will use their imagination and be as creative as they can be, if they are allowed the time.  When a child is talking as a practitioner you can observe and record their development by listening and acknowledging what they are saying.

   Report (7) (0)  |   12 years, 8 month(s) ago