Question:

sibling molestation. I just found out that my husband molested his sister when they were younger

by Guest8670 | 12 years, 7 month(s) ago

I just found out that my husband molested his sister when they were younger and one of her friends on one occasion. He went to counceling when he was younger for this but the family has never dealt with it. Now as adults my sister-in-law wants nothing to do with our family. I understand that she is just now dealing with it, but I don't know how to deal with it. Mly husband says that after therapy he blocked out a lot of the information so he doesn't recall the details.
How do I come to terms with this?

Tags: molestation, Sibling

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Guest7839

This is a very sensitive and pretty gray area and for lot of good reasons.

How old was he when he melested his sister and is she his real sister?
It isn't an easy call to say he was molester or curious kid. Depends a lot on how/what he was learning about sexuality from whom. People often do things in the moment, that they regret seconds later, because in the moment, they felt justified in their actions but in your case you are saying he actually had a problem and got help for it.

What is the nature of your relationship before and after you found out what your husband did? Do you have any children and how long have you been married for?

Do you think his molestation pattern has persisted or was a one-shot deal way back then. This is obviously dangerous ground to be on and could potentially cause a rift in the family at many levels.

Depending on your relationship with him, you could approach the subject and tell him how you "feel" when you are around him and mention that you think what he has done is hard on you and some times you are affraid (that is if you are actually affraid) and see how he reacts.  People do change, this is a very hard subject to deal with but strong families weather any storm.
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