Question:

why am I doing this? I was seven when I started having s*x, now I am eighteen at the moment but I

by Guest2778  |  11 years ago

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I was seven when I started having s*x, now I am eighteen at the moment but I want to say something, I was raised in Mississippi, was on a lot of medication for random things and was surrounded by teens who were going through puberty. I will not say that it was against my will because it was not. I (am g*y by the way) have had problems coping with the sexual side of my past relationships since then. I cant seem to grow past my fear of being the "top" for some reason I don't understand yet. Now in Mississippi, for me there were not a lot of children my age to play with, and I was not the MOST boyish of children however I was NOT effeminate to the point of cross dressing or ect. ect. , I was more into learning about my environment and not so much as interested in shooting birds with BB guns and would work up quite the tearworks when my older and much more mannish friends and peers would bring down one. I don't know what has become of me but those experiences were almost seven years ago ( I moved to texas because of a melt down years ago.) and I lost contact of those guys. For the best I suppose. But is this a form of Stockholm's Syndrome? I don't know what is happening to me. It just seems as if all the relationships I have been in have failed miserably, because of my own misunderstandings on the way this stuff works. I am not a good top. never have been. just not the type. but I always seem to choose people who I am sexually incompatible with. Am I doing this subconsciously or what?

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  1. Guest3193
    You sound like a sensible guy. And I don't think it's a problem with you that you pick guys you are incompatible with. I believe it's more of the fact that you are 'programmed' to make those kinds of decisions by this point. You've done it repeatedly in the past and now it just happens without you even having to think of it. I'd say just give it time and thought. Remember, the brain can overcome anything. If you want to talk more, feel free to message me.
    http://www.myspace.com/justanotherrainbowboy2
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Latest activity: 11 years, 10 month(s) ago.
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